I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
my liver is dry heaving
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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