if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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