but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
