You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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