Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
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