Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize