Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize