K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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