The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
