oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I could fuck to npr.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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