saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
ugly people sure do ruin things
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
