Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
