I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
thus making me awesome and them whores
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
