I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
