this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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