i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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