Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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