Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
