Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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