You really coming over, don't trick.
I hate your face
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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