i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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