Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
PANTIES FOUND
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
