just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
