It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
