before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize