What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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