There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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