I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
