We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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