good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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