Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
