why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I don't think brook has ever known best
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
