ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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