I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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