Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
