So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
