I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize