Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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