do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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