there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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