booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
