Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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