I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
