Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
