my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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