But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
