Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
