he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize