so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
