yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize